In the past 24 hours I have been told that I an egotistical, rude, unpredictable, self-absorbed bitch. Really?
Allow me to clarify a few things:
I am a passionate woman. I choose to LIVE my life. I’m the type of person who reaches for the next idea with both hands and claps with glee when it inspires me. The inverse is also true: I am not afraid to show my emotions, to cry, pout, shriek or laugh. I have a direct, no-nonsense approach to life, and I cut straight through the bullshit and get right to the heart of the matter. I am also not afraid of standing up, speaking out or rocking the boat. However, while these qualities show that I am strong, they also tend to piss people off, which brings me to my next point.
I will be the first to admit that I can be exceptionally harsh. That I am willing to stand up and speak out can be intimidating, but I am not a charmer, and I don’t pretend to be. I am usually the one who points out the elephant in the room simply because nobody else has the guts to do it. I don’t put up with BS, and if accused of some wrongdoing I will defend myself. If that means I have to get down and dirty to do it, then so be it. Most people are not used to this, and it makes them uneasy. I can fully accept that being so direct can be off-putting, but how exactly does this translate into me being egotistical? Does it have something to do with this website, and how I’m putting everything out there for all to see? Well, no.
You see, I do not care if you like what I write here or not. In fact, if you don’t like it then talk about it, debate it, start a conversation, something, anything, just get the words and ideas flowing. That’s the whole point. I did not start this website to stroke my ego – I started it so that I could keep writing, and honing my skills by discussing several different topics while getting other people involved and maybe I could learn something new in the process. If anything I’ve written makes you stop and think, then I’m thrilled. Whether people like it or not is irrelevant. I also do not hold to the arrogant belief that what I say is always right, and I’m more than happy to be proven wrong. I’d rather have an in-depth discussion with one well-informed individual who disagrees with me than several pats on the back.
However, because I’m honest and forthright and not afraid to just be myself, I’m apparently unworthy of having friends. This is ridiculous. I know people that are massive jerks and total pains to be around, making my “now see here” confrontations tame by comparison. Yet they have friends and spouses, so how do you explain that? Being abrasive at times does not mean you are that way ALL the time. People are more complex than that. Just because you haven’t seen all sides of an individual doesn’t mean they don’t exist. Painting an individual’s character as a silhouette turns them into a cartoon. As Jessica Rabbit said, “I’m not bad; I’m just drawn that way.”